and probably find out. But since I'm no stranger to doing things the non-traditional way, I'm getting more and more comfortable with it.

Here's the thing: I'm a storyteller (just ask my kids, they'll roll their eyes and agree wholeheartedly).

I am not a marketer.

I am not a hustler.

I am not a fan of capitalism.

I am the author of three books of my own and I am incredibly proud of them all, to be certain. I am also tremendously grateful to the organizations that published those books, and... seeking publication and all of the things that came after that were some of the most cringe-worthy things I've ever done. I have said more times than I can count that I wish I lived in a time when writers wrote and publishers distributed their stories to the world so writers could just continue to stay in their sweet spot and write.

​

Two summers ago, I finished my most recent manuscript. It has undergone some revisions since then and I have done the thing you do - sharing it with editors, beta readers, friends, talked about it, spent countless hours researching agents and publishers and submitted it to a few places (albeit halfheartedly). I've racked up some rejections, gotten ghosted by agents a dozen times or more, and gone about my business, working on other things, coaching, living my life. But that manuscript is permanently lodged in a part of my brain, dormant, waiting for me to get a burst of energy and enthusiasm about selling it again. It is taking up space and energy and increasingly, I have been questioning this entire process.

Maybe it's my frustration with what I know about the publishing world - how the gatekeepers are mostly about what makes money and who has a platform, how little money actually goes to the writer, the amount of waste and the way it all slots in to the machinations of capitalism. Certainly no small part of it is my impatience (see above where I said I completed this manuscript two years ago), knowing that even if I did secure an agent and/or a publisher, it could be 18 months to two years before the book reaches a bookstore and with the way the world is right now, will there be bookstores by then?

Maybe it's my inherent desire to "blow shit up" and do things in a different way that feels more in alignment with my values and who I am.

But I'm cutting out the middle folks.

No, I'm not self-publishing. That still gives money to places like the one owned by "the big bad bald man" as my youngest affectionately refers to the bazillionaire who is currently pissing people in Venice off because he feels entitled to rent the town out for his wedding.

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Remember the days of serial radio programs?

Remember the days when there was a show you loved that came on at 7:30pm every Thursday and you waited eagerly for the next episode?

(I do. I'm that old).

I'm bringing that back, but enhanced. Because my storytelling is lacking if it isn't relational, and because the world has changed, I've decided to use the Buy Me a Coffee platform to share my next memoir, one piece at a time. My current plan is to publish a new part of it every two weeks, and host a discussion/AskMeAnything the week after to hear what folks think, what questions they have, how it's being received.

For me, this solves a whole lot of issues I have. It is in alignment with degrowth principles*, reducing waste of producing physical books, the cost of shipping them all over the place, the fuel it takes to get them from point A to point B (and C and D and ...) , eliminating the spreading thin of resources to prop up corporations. It is also relational, offering folks the opportunity to be in discussion with me and each other about the writing, to ask questions, and to engage (albeit virtually). It means that the manuscript is no longer lodged in my brain, taking up space and energy, and frees me up to do more of the other work I love.

I've researched the platform and it appears to be one of the most ethical, creator-centric platforms around. There is flexibility in that folks can sign up for a membership to support me monthly with a small amount or with one-time donations/payments, and the creator (me) gets 95% of the funds versus the way lots of other platforms do it.

There are a couple challenges that remain: I'll still have to 'market' the work to some degree so that folks know about it and check it out and for folks who don't primarily process information by reading visual text, it could prove challenging or utterly useless. You can help me with the first challenge if you start to read and want to share with people you know. There's no timeline that is hard and fast - the work will be there and if someone starts reading a year from now, they just have to start at the beginning and go at their own pace. As for the second issue, if the story is compelling and enough folks sign up to pay me for it, I'll figure out how to do it as an audiobook. I loved doing that for Truth Has a Different Shape, but it's expensive because I want to pay Moses (the sound engineer) a fair wage for his work.

A note about payment: I know it's a leap of faith for folks to pay if they are only getting a new vignette every other week, but it's a leap of faith to choose a book off the shelf and hope you'll like it, too. In line with the way I feel about compensation for my work, there is no set price - you decide what is comfortable for you and pay it. You can sign up for a membership in the beginning and change it over time if you want. You can start by giving the minimum and then if you decide later you can/want to do a membership, go for it. There is flexibility. Storytelling isn't and never has been about money for me; it is about expressing myself and creating connection. And, we all deserve to be compensated for the work we do (and we all have bills to pay).

The first installment will be live on June 30. It is titled Space Mountain, Baby: My Journey of Severance and Embracing What Comes. It begins with the story of my sudden and unexpected divorce, but quickly becomes a story about breaking up with all the things. It is part mid-life crisis, part liberation, part distilling my life down to what is really important. As I wrote, I had a slow dawning of the understanding that this world I had been trained so well to live in (and had done with such compliance and effort) was rooted in quicksand. My husband’s exit simply gave me an excuse to really contemplate a new way of being and moving through the world that led to questioning feminism, patriarchy, capitalism, white supremacy, and colonialism, among other things. It gave me the opportunity to look at where I had been complicit in those systems and where my life could shift, and how I could not only stop making things harder for myself, but also begin to dismantle those systems that are stacked against so many of us from the outset.

Hit me up with questions/concerns/your ideas. I love hearing from folks.

*I realize that using technology is also incredibly resource-heavy and extractive. But until we can sit around in communes and tell stories at night by the fire, this still feels less impactful and consumption-based than traditional publishing.